Let them be little

So my baby went into nursery this past Sunday(sigh). You would think with her being my third child to go to nursery it wouldn't be such an emotional experience for me, but it is. With Aislynn and Bailey it was so different. With them being only four months apart I knew that they would eventually be together. I knew that they would have each other in nursery. There would always be something familiar and safe and comfortable for them there. With Aislynn and Bailey because of how close in age they are, Adam would take one baby to Priesthood and I would take the other to Primary with me. I was actually looking forward to nursery with them. They were both so ready when the time came. There were times when some crying happened, but for the most part they accepted nursery with open arms. We lived in Florida at the time and our girls basically made up the nursery. There were a couple of other kids, but it was a very small group and it was so great because you knew your little ones were getting one on one attention, and when they weren't Aislynn and Bailey would play with each other.

Well, Cecely is officially eighteen months old. We did the normal introduction to nursery about a month ago. We started bringing her into Nursery and sitting with her for about an hour and then we would take her out. She loves the nursery leaders and all the toys. For those of you who know Cecely you know that she is a tender hearted little girl. Don't get me wrong, she can hold her own with the best of them. However, that is usually only with her sisters. With other children she is a people pleaser. She gives them toys and loves and kisses and is very hurt if they don't respond the same way. You can look at her wrong and she will give that cuter than cute pout and then start heavy breathing and then start crying. It will melt your heart and break it at the same time. So when nursery day came this past Sunday it was an emotional day for me. The nursery leaders are so great with the kids. They love them so much. I see them cuddle and kiss and hold and play all day. I wasn't worried about that, I was just a little sad that my baby wasn't a baby anymore. She has now graduated to playing with all the other little kids. As I went in to nursery with her I watched her grab some toys and immediately start playing with them. I decided to sneak out quick and as I turned around before leaving she was looking at me. She wasn't crying, I think she was just wondering where I was going. I looked in the little peek hole they have and she was fine.

Periodically throughout the next two hours I would see nursery leaders in the hallway. They kept telling me that she was doing fine, she was so sweet and played so well with the other kids. They told me how she loved snack time and cleaned up the toys like a big girl. I couldn't believe it. Is this my little girl who is so "stranger danger" prone. Is this my little girl who will not let me leave her sight even when eating in her highchair. I guess maybe I was wrong and it was me who was going to be emotional over this day and not her. Well, during the last hour of church I was teaching a lesson in Young Women's. I was so amazed the Cecely had made it through all of church and didn't have to be brought to me in tears and traumatized over this whole nursery thing. The last half hour of class I could hear crying down the hall and it sounded like Cecely. I kept on teaching and sure enough my girls said "Sister Bingham, your little girl is peeking through the window". I looked up and one of the nursery leaders was holding my little trooper. Her face was red and cheeks tear stained. She immediately saw me and started crying and sobbing even harder. Sister Freidericks handed her over to me and told me she was so good, but that the last half hour she was done, and wanted mama. I held her tight, gave her lots of kisses. My young women also gave her loves and smiles. As I continued my lesson my heart was full. I was secretly glad that she had been brought to me. I guess I felt like she still missed me and needed me. It may sound weird, but I missed her. I felt like my hands were searching for something to do. My heart was content in holding her and consoling her. She will go to nursery again next week, and the week after that. She will then be in Primary and so on and so forth. She will keep moving up and growing up. I cannot stop that(although secretly I would if I could). One thing is certain though she will always need her mama. Maybe it's wishful thinking, but I don't think so. I am 33 and I still need my mom.

Here's to my big girls!! I love you.